I arrived at work this morning late because my mom was running behind. She does not realize the clients expect to see me. Then I found out my sister Rune the CAT, hijacked my column in todays edition of the West Hawaii Today. To top it all off, I learned that my new brother Rome got a bath today and extra treats for not peeing on my mom. Ok, so sometimes I get nervous, this is not my fault I had a rough start before I arrived in my new family, cut me some slack, or at least some paper towels.
It is very hard being me, and lets face it they really have no idea. I rise at the crack of dawn, this is when my bladder says it is full. I shake and stretch as quietly as possible, it is not my fault I have like five different tags on my collar that sound like Santa at Christmas.
Then my sister cries and I go check on her. At this point mom or dad or both get up and see if she is ok, would it kill them to go downstairs and feed me and let me out at this point, sure it is barely light out but honestly I have to pee. Nope... they go back to bed. Then my brother gets up and uses the bathroom still no go for me, I lay back in my bed and cross my legs.
By the time my family gets up to finally let me out they have all used the facilities and I...have not. So out I race into the morning air to mine and my bladders relief only to have whom ever let me out say "come on Pike hurry up and go potty". I am sorry ..what did you just say. Hurry up! Oh no this, this I am going to enjoy. Then they mention breakfast which I hate to admit can stop me mid-stream. I race inside performing all my greatest tricks, only to have them tell me to calm down. Now wait just a minute here I usually have to perform the equivalent of an act of congress only to be told to settle down so I can eat. I don't think so, I do the whole sit, lay down , shake, left and right, wait, chase the tail, and speak, with the fluidity of a prima ballerina on ice skates in under 20 seconds, this my friends deserves some serious positive reinforcement. Please, stop talking to me and fill up my bowl.
Then outside I go again and after the little wait and feed me game they can wait on me. I run down the block knowing full well they will not use the power whistle at 6:30 in the morning, so I run a bit more, then come back out of breath to a seriously mad family member telling me "GET IN THE HOUSE", like I have any where else to go.
Then I wait while the entire family gets ready to start the day. I get loaded into the back of my moms car while she drives my sister to school, I get car sick, and there is nothing like the windy road up to preschool to settle a tummy. By the time I get to work after a Starbucks run, a bank run and lord only knows what else. I am more shaken then stirred. I get there and I am so excited to get inside that I wait by the door making as much noise as possible with my Collar and Tag one dog band. When the girls that work for me finally let me in they proceed to put my please behave collar on, retiring the jingle bells for the end of the day. I spend the rest of the day saying hi to all of our clients and their pets, with only a treat or two from my good buddies from Fed EX and UPS. I get let out several times a day, but only on leash. I wander a bit, can you blame me for needing a little space, my job is exhausting. I just lay down, and someone comes in needing to be greeted. I lay down and again I need to make appearances. Those cats think they do all the work, yeah it is super hard sleeping all day. I only nap for 8 hours a day and they sleep the whole day through.
By the time we are ready to close I have greeted more people then I have toes and I am exhausted. It is at this point that I am given back my jingle bells and I am let out... free at last, nope. Pike "get your puppy" now I get to show the puppy the ropes. He gets to run around like a complete fool and I am supposed to keep him in line, how about on a line. I say thank you to the staff, put the puppy in his kennel and get loaded into the truck for another stirring ride home. When I finally get set free to run I have more energy then the bullet train in Japan. I eat dinner, rip around the yard and count my toys,2 balls, a raccoon, 1 rope, and my wubba ( best squeaky toy on the planet) and I shift into 6th gear ( in cars this is the fun gear), and I let her rip. I race around in circles cutting so close to my family members I actually cause their clothes to ruffle, I feel like a rally car driver, oh the speed. When I come in at dusk I am spent. I walk around squeaking my raccoon and hoping someone decides we should have popcorn for a snack, I will munch until my sister stops dropping pieces for my, doggie delight and then I will pass out under the sofa and wait for these humans I live with to go to bed. I get let out and then it is up stairs to bed where I curl up with my mouse and my blanket and dream...until the dawn breaks again. RUFF Life I know. What can I say it is all in a days work.
